sylvia and sylvana are both starting to really on my nerves

they told me they are not doing relay for life 3 days before everything is due

to make it worse they made up a lame excuse of their cousins graduation…..on june 2???? college graduations already happened and high school graduations are later in the year. 

im pissed

if they didn’t want to participate they could’ve told me earlier

same with lourdz

she told me the day before

but seriously I’m starting to hate the both of them

they call everyone try hards and say they have nobody has a social life

well, they are the ones that are try hards and do everything ahead of time and stay up til 3 making sure that everything is perfect

stop being hypocrites

and stop using people too

you never take anything seriously and people get annoyed ok

and sylvia crys every time something doesn’t go her way

fuck you and grow up

stop inviting your bitchass friends one our house to sleep in at night

they’re so annoying and have no respect

i don’t want to see their faces when i wake up in the morning

and no I’m not going outside to see them

FUCK YOU

ok stop being a bitch now

fuck you

you don’t love

you don’t deserve my love back

if you’re going to be a bitch to me then I’m not going to be any better to you.

i have to put on a happy face for everyone

i have to make a card and bake stuff for everyones birthday

i have to get into a good college

i have to get grades

i have to make them proud

i have to be the god one

then i am always the one that gets yelled at for never being good enough

I’m just gonna stop

my brother and my sister never do anything and my parents love them

whats the point of trying anymore

i wish my parents would see from my point of view

and i wish they would realize that i feel like shit half the time

honestly, my dad is being the witchiest person in the whole world

stop being mad at everyone

you’re not the only person who has a hard life

stop giving everyone an attitude for every little mistake we made

if i ever did that to you you would kick me out of the house

stop being a little bitch about everything 

can’t stand you when you have this attitude

honestly sometimes i feel that my parents and no one else in my whole family understands what i go through. i wake up at 6:30 every single day. go to school. come back home at 5:30. then i do all my homework. then i have to go to the gym. and then go to sleep late and repeat it all over again.

god forbid i miss the bus one day and now all hell breaks lose and i am irresponsible. honestly my day is way busier then either of my parents and sometimes i want them to live a week in my shoes and realize how it goes. i am always being made fun of for everything.

and my dad told me to control myself. how about you control your fucking anger. he starts yelling for no reason and its just like shut the fuck up you can be wrong sometimes too. it just gets me so freaking annoyed.

omg 23 other people running?

i have no chance

i just wanna do something great with my high school life but i will never be good enough for these people

especially not better than 23 of the best kids at BCA

now I’m completely at a loss

i have no chance

i have no chance

i have no chance

but maybe i do

ok so maybe i started liking him again….idk

we’ve gotten closer

but he talks to all the popular kids

and i dont

he’s way out of my league

but i really like him

i wish we could get closer

i wish he would realize how much i like him

i know i know i am only just a freshman……..but honestly i already pretty much what i wanna do with my college life…,i want to go to Columbia.

ik thats like impossible tog et accepted there but whats the harm in aiming high?

i just wanna take APs and IBs and SATs and do college apps and get accepted to college and graduate.

i wish it was that easy

im gonna have two long and hard years ahead of me if i even wanna stand a chance into getting into a good college. 

i wanna make my parents proud and i want to show people that i really am smart even though i am a girl and i want to do engineering.

i see my sister and how happy she is at college and i just want the same thing (i am so happy for her)

ok i don’t even know what I’m getting myself into right now???

basically running for class rep for student council but I’m not even popular? what am i doing? i am just going to make a fool of myself?

its ok because i have to try. idk i feel like every little thing i do brings me a little closer to possibly going to Columbia…..i just really really really want to get into a good high school and since I’m not like super smart and not athletically talented any other thing that is going to help me stand out is a plus

but the worst part is that i am kind of running against sylvia

i dont wanna sound like a mean person but i kind of want only me to get elected

idk i just feel like i care about this more then her but i also gave her the impression that i want to do a joint campaign. 

hopefully people see that i really am dedicated and they vote for me :)